I haven’t posted or created much in a while, this saddens me but it had been busy times. Hang in there with me, soon I will have the time and soon I will be motivated. It is an essential part of my being.

and I go about my daily routine, go about my typical day, so on and so forth. I’m on autopilot. I’m no where close to where I want to be. I hate what I’m doing. I hate my selfish needs, and wants. Hate my anxiousness, my restlessness, and reluctance.

Most of all what I hate, is that I hate. Is that I can’t be satisfied with what I’ve got going for me, that I can’t look on the bright side or be optimistic. That I don’t believe anything I tell myself, and that everyday I feel like a complete stranger to myself. Everything I do or try, inevitably I feel failure.

I don’t want to live in this outer-body experience for the rest of my life.

recently, I have been busy. Busy with work mostly and not having time to create anymore; to be honest I think I’m all out for a while. In order to work you have to be moved whether it be negative or positive but still, you must be moved.

Artistically speaking, specifically musically…I’m blocked. I have no motive to write or record anytime soon. Over the past year almost two I have been making so much music I’m afraid I just have to sit back and watch what happens next. I havent even played in weeks or felt like singing. 

Referring to photography I hope to have some shoots set up soon, but I make no promises. 

As for writing, well I’m writing this and the occasional journal entry.

I dont know what this is. Who am I even telling?

Tomorrow who knows, I could disregard this all you never quite know with me.